


But I feel a little safer when im with you

by stupid_stories



Category: IT - Stephen King
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, Homophobia, Inspired by Music, Richie makes eddie a playlist
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-28
Updated: 2019-09-28
Packaged: 2020-10-29 20:30:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 2,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20802521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stupid_stories/pseuds/stupid_stories
Summary: Richie Toizer loves Eddie. She makes a playlist that to reveal how she feels about Eds.





	1. Richie makes a big gay playlist

**Author's Note:**

> None of these songs are mine obviously. The link to the accompanying playlist https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLtoHL4j3Evx2xHoA75OZpm1gvyaMEehIK

The playlist 

<strike> </strike> <strike></strike> ** <strike></strike> ** <strike></strike>

Richie had just finished the playlist. Her fingers gliding over the computer keys. She was crying, she didn’t really know why though. Probably because if someone ever found she made a homoromantic playlist and confronted her about it she’d die right there in the spot. She had spent so long on this playlist. Every song meant something to her.

They all had to do with her feelings for Edith.

Its not like she ever in a million years had a chance with good ol Eds anyways...right? She often complimented me, borderline flirting at that, but thats just gals being pals. 

She’s still crying. Fuck! Why is she still crying?

She gets a text from Edith.

**EDDIE SPAGHETTI:** Finish that playlist yet?

Oh shoot me now! Richie had forgot that she told Edith about the playlist. She could just pass it off as a project for her internship at the community radio station. 

**Trash mouth: **Maybe **  
**

**EDDIE SPAGHETTI: **Send the link.

**Trash mouth:** Ok.

She did it she actually did it she sent Edith that playlist. She was screwed. 


	2. Honeybee

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first track. All rights to steam powered giraffe. Please go listen to their stuff.

Honeybee

Edith plugs in her headphones and opens up Spotify. She clicks the link Rich sent her. She starts with the first song, Honeybee by steam powered giraffe.

As she listens to the song she notices two things. This song is absolutely beautiful and the lyrics. 

_“You didn’t have to look my way,_

_Your eyes still haunt me to this day,_

_You didn’t have to say my name,_

_Ignite my circuits to start a_ flame,

_but you did.”_

She instantly thought of Richie. The way her quick glances and cocky smirks make her feel. This playlist was made my Richie for Edith but that doesn’t make sense. Why would she put a love song in here? She probably just thought Edith would like it.

_“Turpentine erase me whole._

_Cause I dont want to live my life alone_

_I was waiting for you all my life._

_Set me free, my honeybee.”_

She was almost crying. By the time the second chorus was finished Eds felt genuine pain. She love her so much. But she knows thats wrong. God and Mommy say so at least. Here in Derry, kids like Eds tend to wind up dead in the quarry. 

If anyone didn’t know than Richie wouldn’t get hurt. She had seen the way Rich was treated by the other girls. So much as a glance in their direction and the went feral. Calling Rich a perv or a homo, or worse. Screw, them actually. They dont mattter.

As the accapella outro ended, the words still ring in Edith’s head.

_”Hello? goodbye! Twas nice to know you how I’ll find myself without you that I’ll never know. I let myself go. Hello? Goodbye! Im rather crazy and I never that i was crazy but what do i know? I let myself go. What what will I do now that you have to go?”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry these are short. They’re just little vent (kinda?) drabbles


	3. You and me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Track two makes Edith remember a strange memory. Song is You and Me by tally hall. They’re a very rad band

You and me

Track two was different, Edith thought. She stared at her ceiling. The opening guitar chords played. She already knew this song. It was You and Me the song Rich played _that day_at the quarry. 

_Two weeks ago._

_ They were at the quarry. Not the losers, just Eds and Rich. It was so beautiful. Richie had jumped into the water. Not even the murky water could flatten the mass of black curls on her head. Edith loved it. Her hair was plain. Brown, extending a little past her shoulders and it was straight as hell. It was so thin do to the misuse of medicine her mom put her through. She found her hair completely ell out sometimes, normally after her mom had bee especially bad to her. They swam around. Richie looked so beautiful in the hot summer sunlight. The water made her forehead glisten. She was such a dork and an idiot, but i loved her. I wasn’t listening to her talk. I was completely caught up in her beauty. _

_ “C’mon Eddie spaghetti! Or I’ll leave you here and go to get your mom! She must be missing me! I haven’t visited her in weeks.” Rich laughed. _

_“Not funny asshole.” She said. The words had no meaning. _

_ We both got out and dried off. Rich had brought her electric guitar. She looks at Edith and says _

_“I dedicate this song to you, cutie.” _

_ She almost had a heart attack, reaching for her inhaler. Rich stops. _

_“Are you ok? Are you having an asthma attack?” She looks so concerned. _

_“No, just the swimming makes me wheezy!” Eddie lied. _

_ Rich just started playing. Singing along to the words _

“Starting on the road  
Carefully unload

Open-eyed and all the light is falling  
Back and forth  
And I can see it of course  
Maybe I am in the way recalling

It's just you

Off again we go  
Another seed to sow  
Another part to keep in proper order

What have I begun?  
Get away undone  
I have seen the signs and I ignored them

Now it's you  
And me  
Divine  
A circular design  
(do do-do do-doo)  
Time, and place, and mind  
Points along the line  
(do do-do do-doo)

Sitting in the park  
Carefully remark  
Everything is better when you're learning

You were in the dark  
And I was in the dark  
Everything is made to keep on turning

It's just you  
And me  
Divine  
A circular design  
(do do-do do-doo)  
Time, and place, and mind  
Points along the line  
(do do-do do-doo)

You and me  
Return to be  
In orbit all the time” 

_ Edith was so shocked. No matter how you interpreted those lyrics it was a cool song. However, the way Richie sang it made it sound like she was singing to a lost lover. It was so beautiful. “I think, I’ll remember that day for the rest of my life.” Edith said on the bike ride home._

The song had ended. Edith was starting to contemplate if she had meant anything by this playlist. Was it a sign? Maybe, just maybe, Rich loved Eds the way she loved her. With an endorphin rush, Edith skips to the next track.


	4. Stay for a while

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Four tracks in and Edith is having a big lesbo panic. Song is Stay for a While by Gibbz.

Stay for a While 

Four songs in. Let’s get going! She starts the third song. It was a slow rhythm with mesmerizing vocals. The songs lyrics hit hard

_” Tonight we’ll talk about whatever you want to, if you don’t well we can sit in silence. I’ll make you drinks from that book you bought me. You say I never use it so let us tonight. C’mon baby stay for a while” _

This awoke something within her. A image was put into her head. Her and Richie, slow dancing in the neon light of Rich’s room. She smells so good like, ** home**. More at home than she ever felt at her actually household. Richie’s fingers tangle into her hair. Edith returns the favour accidentally tugging a bit too hard. She didn’t seem to mind it. Their faces were so close and then. They kiss. Richie’s red lipstick smearing across both their mouths. Eddie didn’t care. Who does really. 

It ended as soon as it started, the beautiful fantasy fades. Edith feels kind of dirty. She just wants to sit in the bathtub and scrub. Scrub until the queer washes off. She knows it doesn’t work like that. Being attractive to the same gender is just some weird brain divergence or whatever.

Feeling guilty, sad and very much in love, Edith rolls over letting the music play on.

“_Good night,_

_Stay for a while baby”_


	5. I want to be your girlfriend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The fifth and final track (it’s short i know) makes everything clear as day. Song is I wanna be your girlfriend by girl in red. (I mean this is the ultimate lesbian angst song)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This isn’t the last chapter there’s going to be two more :)

I want to be your girlfriend 

The last song. This wasn’t a long playlist by any means but it definitely had an impact. Edith was now almost convinced that Richie liked her. Maybe, not. However it was a possibility. She skipped to the next track. 

The song started. It was ok, Edith thought but it really wasn’t her style when it came to music. Then the chorus started.

_”I dont want to be your friend! I want to kiss your lips!”_

That’s all she needed. Richie certainly wouldn’t send her a lesbian crush song, in a playlist she mad for Edith unless she meant it. 

She glanced around the room.

”How do I go about doing this? I cant just walk up to her and be like “hahahah that playlist you made was totally homosexual for me and I’m going to make out with you now”.She whispered. 

Then came the plan.

She wrote it down 

  1. Text Richie and ask if she can meet me at the bridge right now. 
  2. Go to said bridge
  3. Don’t panic 
  4. Ask about the playlist in a way that won’t make her feel uncomfortable 

Ask her to be your <strike>girlfriend </strike><strike></strike>

No that’s not happening. Ediths mind starts to drown in what if’s. “What if Richie thought she was disgusting and left?” or, “What if she told the losers, her parents, or the whole damn town of Derry, Maine?” What if the next missing poster was her own. No one would look for her. F*gs deserve to die.

Then it stops. She’s going to do this and if this is the hill (or rather bridge) she dies on, so be it. 

Edith reaches for her phone. Scrolls to her contacts to find **Trashmouth **

**Eddie spaghetti to trashmouth: Meet me at the kissing bridge in five.**

**Trashmouth is typing **

**Trashmouth: Ok see ya Eds ;)**

So there it is. She grabbed her stuff tiptoeing past her passed out mother and sneaking out the door.

”If this is the last time i see this house, tell bill to take all my stuff and burn it” she whispered to no one. 

The meeting was only a short bike ride away.


	6. Richie has regret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What Rich was doing when Edith listened to the playlist

Riche has regret 

This was the worst thing she has ever done. This was a mistake.

She sits there worrying for about the whole 20 minutes it took Edith to listen to the playlist. Paranoid and restless any noise would cause her to go into shock. 

Then her phone vibrated.

She took a sharp intake of air as she flipped over the phone. She saw the contact name and painful and carefully stopped to read it.

Why did Edith want to go to the bridge? 

Worst case scenario is that she told the loser that their trusted friend is a dirty flaming homosexual and they were now on their way to kick her ass. 

This was bad. If this was the last time she was ever in the house, she left a really long note explaining to her parents about what happened and that how she turned out wasn’t their fault.

So, Richie left the house.


	7. Confessions on the kissing bridge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The bridge meeting

Confessions under the kissing bridge 

Both girls were nervous, arriving around the same time at the kissing bridge. Throwing their bikes down they slowly approach eachother, afraid.

Richie speaks first.

” Im soooooo sorry for sending that playlist to you I should’ve kept it to myself but i guess you know know so. What everyone says about me is true. I am a queer. And i like you. I understand if you don't want to tall to me anymore. Go tell the losers for all I care! Hell, I wouldn’t blame you if you threw me into the quarry right now. I deserve it!” Tears start to come from her eyes.

”Richie you beautiful idiot I am in love with you! I thought you were coming here to attack me!” Edith shouted in a not so hushed tone. It was late at night no one was going to hear. 

“YoU WhaT nOW.! mY GOd i LOvE yOu TOo!” Richie forced out voice cracking.

Then Edith stepped forward 

Richie stepped forward 

They met eyes. 

They were so close one inch from...

”Is this the part where we kiss?” Richie blurts out.

“Just shut up and do it beautiful.” Edith responds.

It is a very long kiss but its what they needed. Both their lips were so soft and just as she had predicted, Richie’s red lipstick was all over her face. She didn’t even care.

Before Edith could make a comment Richie grabs her hand.

”I need to show you something....” she whispers.

They make their way around to the other side of the bridge. Clear as day in the bridge the was a large R+E carved into the wood.

”Did yo-“

”Yes. It was a little while ago. I ran away crying thought there was something wrong with me. Now i see there’s nothing wrong with this. No shame in getting to love you Edith Kasprack.” Riche finished her sentence.

”So we’re girlfriends now right?” Edith asked.

”Yes you beautiful idiot.” 

They found a comfortable position lying in the grass. Edith’s arms tangled Richie’s neck. They felt so warm, so complete in each other’s presence that they stayed there for a really long time.

If one thing was for sure they were both so thankful for that playlist.


End file.
